SUPER EAGLES, TWITTER AND THE NATIONAL CONFERENCE: NO GOOD RESULT

Living is generally difficult, but living in Nigeria is another reality. Everyone is angry at one thing or the other. I am not just talking about those on the streets but every single Nigerian living within the shores of this country who has a good idea of how this country works. The fundamental cause of all the problems we have is bad leadership and of course NEPA or whatever it is called these days. These problems in any other country of similar status would be embroiled in a major war or invasion from Europe or The USA but we are Naija and “we don see tings”. Lagos is just a mad house on its own and we Lagosians are so accustomed to the constant madness that its absence is never craved. We long for the fight between the conductor and the “agberos” at the bustop, or the police vs Army fight, or the Lastma vs Other Government officers fight. We long for the opportunity to cross the express when the pedestrian bridge is not far off just because the bridges are too steep or shaky. We rely on what we have and expect it to be enough. We expect the Super Eagles to fight for wages and still go on to win the world cup simply because we are Nigerians. We would love the first Lady to come on air and lament the display of the super eagles so we can have something else to laugh at, like she hasn't done enough already. Our missing girls are still missing and we are waiting for Jack Bauer and co to go capture the Militants threatening our country’s sovereignty. Nigerians are just proudly frustrated and all these episodes are ways to channel these frustrations. We do not expect the government to proffer any long term solution or any solution at all for that matter. We have given the government plenty of occasions to prove that they are a government and not a cabal of cake hungry politicians, they have failed miserably and so we know we can’t do anything to them. They are like military men in civilian uniforms and we see it as a "no alternative" government because the military in military uniform will Jail you for hash tagging an officers name. At least we have freedom of speech in this government. So if Jonathan doesn't bring back our girls or the super eagles disappoint in the world cup, whether it is their fault or the fault of unseen circumstances, we take out our collective frustration on whichever scapegoat comes our way. This is our means of escape from the ever increasing sources of anger, twitter, BBM, Facebook. We rant and rant until whoever we have marked has committed suicide then we collectively blame social media and the devil.

So to my fellow countrymen, be careful of the numerous frustrated people out there. They prey on your weaknesses and failure and exploit your silence. They hide behind hash tags on social media to vent their national disappointment. We know it is the fault of the government and we know the government is not a person so we look for the most recent “F-UP” and label them. This won’t solve the problem in anyway, just like the National Conference wont, but we do it anyways and delight in the activity devoid of results. This is the Naija way. For now we try to change it as we live with it. I am rather sure we won’t always need a committee to seat before a solution is proffered to the why we are not a world power or No. 1 in FIFA ranking. The Blame game however is not the way to go but as the saying goes "na u get ur mouth"

Chances lost

I saw her for the first time in 21 years. I did not believe that I'd still recognize her, especially as I wasn't expecting to see her. Not at that moment, not like that. It was a very crowded bus stop and she just appeared like a vision before me. She had grown up a lot and a lot of her features had considerably matured. She was now a woman. The innocence was no longer in her eyes like I knew it back then. It was neither in mine. I knew we both had changed, I hoped I would not recognize her again but her eyes had not lost its glimmer. After all these years I could still remember those eyes. In the midst of my uncertainty and dilemma I just stood there and did nothing as she walked past me. She couldn't recognize me or was she just exhausted from a busy day at work? Whatever it was that happened in that moment, I let her pass me by. I could have called out her name and maybe then she would recognize me and run into my arms and say "oh, I have been waiting for this day" or something of the like. I just watched her pass, I could have done the spooky thing and follow at a safe distance to locate her house or destination. I assumed she would always come through this route for some reason I can't make sense of now but after 3 years of going to that bus stop by 2.pm everyday hoping to see her again, I guess I will never get another chance to see her. I can only console myself that it was never meant to be. I have lost the opportunity to meet my IFUNANYA.

Super Eagles, Brazil and Pharell Williams "Happy".

Goals in every match till the super Eagles came along, many super Eagles die hard fan will say that it was bound to happen at some point, but the regular sense of reason will ask the Balotelli question, "why always me?" , me in this case being the Nigerian team currently at Brazil. Many will continue to argue we could do better and I won't argue with that philosophy, we should always believe that we can even if we know it is mightily steep, the odds stacked against us. I would have been dancing to a "happy" titled song if that draw was against the mighty Argentina but I will still save that dance for the last match against Argentina, why? Because I believe we can still get a good performance and an even better result against the star studded Argentine team. First up though is the debutants. Looks a difficult task and ask seeing how the Bosnian team played in their last match but we are naija and we are super. Bosnia and Herzegovina had better be afraid. We don't fly in Iran but we cruise in Europe and as no one is writing Spain off, watch out for Nigeria.
Meanwhile, i'd keep listening to Sergio Mendes rendition of "masqenada" till after the game with Argentina.

And a few days later we are in the second round. do we stand a chance against the French? one way to fine out. We beat them and they g home otherwise we play our hearts out.

RICH KID POOR KID

This is not like the rich dad poor dad episode, this is the reality of some lives around you, all over the world. This is the evidence of polarity and discrimination that can never be erased or destroyed, at least not in our life time. Not because we (this generation and many generations before ours) have not tried, but simply because it is what it is. This is life.

RICH KID:

Goes to the best schools available from infancy, intelligence is not in question, he excels, some say because of the enabling environment he finds himself in, others, because he is naturally gifted and still others because his parents have paid the price and bought excellence for him. He graduates at a very young age because his schools do not go on strike and comes back to the country to integrate and know his roots and his people. He is extravagantly rewarded on his return, with a certificate in hand, the minimum requirement for any graduate, but he has more. Even when he was “abroad” he won several local and international scholarships, many would say he didn’t deserve it or more importantly, he didn’t need it. He got it nonetheless. His return is coloured with fun-fare and a contract of employment in one of the top companies in the industry of his interest. The top of his worries is the traffic and the harshness of the Nigerian sun on his very delicate skin.

POOR KID:

Attends a public school until the level of corruption in it pushes his parents to withdraw him from the public school to a very expensive private school in the country. After a few years he drops out because his parents can no longer afford the fees. He manages to seat for entrance examinations to the unity schools with affordable fees although it is very far-away from home. He survives the harshness of the local boarding school system and is successful in all his certificate exams. His return home is greeted with a list of expectations as his parents have both retired from the country’s civil service and are expecting their pension and gratuity (if it ever comes). He scores high in the matriculation exam, but he knows no one in the university admin office to push his admission through even after he scored way above the schools cut off mark. He finally gets the admission albeit after 3 attempts to study the course of his dreams. His stay in school is frustrated by lack of infrastructure, strikes and lecturers trying to sell hand-outs to pass their course. He survives this and graduates. The expectations are even higher from home but he knows now that he has to get, not just any job but a good job to take of his ageing and ailing parents and to elevate his status. Maybe he would break in to the elite group and buy a house on the island or ikoyi. The top of his worries? How long will he have to continue like this?

It is not a level playing ground. Never was and never will. Strength, however is required to break in to the upper echelons of the society and more strength to remain there. 

Be

What to be
Its easy
Good or bad
Evil is much deeper
But only one
Not both
Good is good
Bad is good
Evil is better
Be good
Or be evil
Be the best however
At being whatever
But be
The good in evil
Or the evil in good
There is no middle ground
Be

The New Love

I've heard a lot of the current accepted trends in relationships. It's the modern guidelines to dating, they call it. The theme? Love is not enough. Funny enough this trend is not propagated by just single or newlyweds but by couples with decades of experience in the marriage institute. So, what ado about love and marriage and all the "in-betweens"? Is the statement correct? Or are we being slowly encouraged to put love in the back seat of a relationship? I am compelled to agree with the later. People are different and so are their opinions but I must say that asides from compatibility of a sexual kind and the absence of abuse, all other arguments against or undermining the importance or significance of love should be thrown out. What is the point of a relationship if not founded and built on love? Most people propagating the "love is not enough" campaign quickly jump and say things like, money, career and all other things and I agree with them to some extent that they are needed in a relationship but not at the expense of love. Love can become enough when all these things are in place but if they are in place and love is absent, what becomes of it? Is it enough to be comfortable and lonely? Many would argue that they would rather cry in a limo than on a bicycle. Who wouldn't? At some point however, love would be all that matters. At that point love would be enough.
I however would like to remind everyone out there that as much as the theme of marriage is love and family and togetherness, it is not a bed of roses. It also comes with a "for better for worse" clause. This clause is one most people like to split. They would gladly take the "for better" part and do away with the "for worse part". When the going is good and your partner is performing all his or her duties and the world is sweet and you can't think of anything better than where you are, love would seem to be enough  or should I say comfort is enough because that is what most modern relationships crave, the kind of comfort that money can buy. When the chips are down and time gets harder and everything you hoped for starts crumbling down, the career, security and money all disappears, what then? When times get harder than either of you anticipated, that is when love is tested. Marriage is not a sign of love now-a-days and that is a sad trend. People marry conveniences and fill comfortable preaching "love is not enough", well I can guarantee that no matter how much money or success your career or job gives you, it will never be enough. Humans always want more and that is a given, but when we are faced with the tough times, we become aware that the person you got married to out of convenience also married you out of convenience and devoid of that convenience, there is no way that selfishness wont creep in and destroy what you once called beautiful (convenience or comfort is what I call it).
Love may not be enough but what else is? What else can replace love?
I wont say love is enough rather I would say "love is all that matters".

Karma this. Karma that.

Karma, I've heard lots about you. How you go round giving people what they deserve? Well, I guess you are kind of partial or I just don't get what your role is in the grand scheme of things.
Who does karma work for? The highest bidder? The most outrageous situations? God? One thing is sure, karma doesn't work for me. Not that I'm in the business of revenge or reward for the loyal, but karma doesn't seem to have a code of conduct. It seems karma doesn't exist in real life, only in movies where the bad guy gets his due at the eventuality of the movies end or in stories where the author controls the fate of each character by his own moral code. In real life, being good or honest or fair doesnt mean you will be visited with kindness and love and justice. No! What actually happens is that the rest of the world uses you and your goodness as a foot mat and no one will remember to say "thank you". In real life, the "bad guys" get away with whatever they do. Just because you are good doesn't mean anyone will be good to you. Just because you are honest doesnt mean those around you will be honest to you. And while you are hoping good will triumph in this world and karma will be faster in carrying out her duties of serving out justice, evil still thrives and well, karma is probably in a shopping mall buying the latest hand bags and accessories to keep up with the trend. This is really sickening and rather depressing, and yet the larger population benefits from karmas benevolence and reluctance to deliver justice to all. The larger population is not divided into good vs evil or predators vs prey. Everyone is a victim, no one is good or evil. It's easy to judge people based on their actions but karma doesn't work that way. It's deeper, it's not even by the ratio of good deeds to evil deeds. But like the ying-yan will describe the human person, its a mixture of good in evil and evil in good. Nobody holy pass. So get off that high horse and know that you too would be on the recipients list of karmas wrath if karma were to operate by human rules or ideas. Eventually, we hope everyone gets what they deserve, but then again what would be the point of mercy, second chances and humanity.

THE PROBLEMS MEN HAVE WITH FEMALES

I am quite sure you must have seen the write up on how all women's problems begins with “men”, the menstruation, menopause and mental problem bit. Well men also have loads of problems with women though the problems don’t begin with women as prefix. The problems men have with women are rather obvious and men being men will not whine about it, at least not in public or in her presence. Here are just a few, from when she is born till well into her womanhood.

1. Tears. Female babies cry and don’t stop crying till they are fully grown. They shed tears for everything. I hadn’t heard of “tears of joy” or “crocodile tears” till I met a woman. We do not like to see or make you cry but ladies, please stop using it as a means to blackmail the male folk. It works sometimes but we are building an immunity towards it.
2. Puberty. You know how guys and girls play hide and seek as kids? well, all that stops once she hits puberty. Most girls just lose all sense of courtesy and respect for the elder men in their neighbourhood once they start getting the curves and the hips starts swaying (by force or by nature).  We enjoy the transition and thank the good Lord for the curves, but do not throw the manners and respect out too. 
3. Sex. Yes! Men admit it all the time, we love sex. We love sex with women and during the act most men are made to believe that women also enjoy sex. Why then do females tend to use sex as a reward for a man’s “good behaviour”? Some would even argue that women could actually enjoy sex more than men (I doubt that). Now sex is used by women to manipulate a lot of innocent young men.
4. Colours and taste. Men are simple creatures, we like blue shirts and brown chinos pants, we like cola flavoured beverages and alcohol. When it comes to colours, science even admits that most men are colour blind. It is in our nature to blend all shades of grey, or blue or pink to be the same colour, no aqua blue or fuchsia pink or stuff like that. It is blue or pink as far as we are concerned.
5. Periods. Most men would agree that when it is that time of the month for their ladies, they go through hell. First it is PMS and mood swings which are often erratic and sometimes violent, then the blood. These would be a good time to go on vacation for men who can afford it but that would be INSENSITIVE. For 5 plus days, men are guaranteed a “no action” period(this has changed), no matter how horny the man may be. The only good thing about periods (for single men and couples who are not ready for children) is that it confirms that the lady is not pregnant.
6. Power. When a woman is in a position of power , the world will know. Power intoxicates men but what it does to women is yet to be described. It is like a volcanic eruption from a valley. We know women are as good at leadership as men, some may even argue that women are better leaders, but is all the power associated drama necessary?
7. Driving. Men simply have a problem with women driving.
These are just a few, but we know you ladies are not perfect and we love you nonetheless, however, we would love you to whine a little less about how we are the cause of global warming and fuel scarcity in the world. We will squeeze the toothpaste tube from the sealed end and raise the toilet seat before we urinate as a sign of our love. Football and hanging out with the boys will however, still go on for a long time to come.

START STOPPING: the oxymoron of the season.

As opposed to “stop starting” which is for quitters or those in the process of evaluation or re-evaluation, start stopping would be seen to be a more positive venture into the gradual cessation of a habit or vice. 
Vices, we all have one or more. The reason for having a vice could differ with individuals but at some point, one may choose to stop or desist from a particular vice, either temporarily or on a more permanent base when the senses are functioning to their full capacity. I encountered a young man recently who claimed to have all the major vices of an ordinary man, drugs, alcohol cigarettes, women (sex) and the life of the party even when he could not afford it. He asked me to choose a vice for him, one which he would not give up because as he said “every man needs a vice”. He asked for my opinion and I gave it to him and then I asked myself, “What vices do I have?”, and more importantly, “what vices should I give up?”. Many people around the world during this season of lent will seek a vice to do without and many people (cynics and critics) would argue the essence of dropping the said vices and habits during lent only to relapse and go back to them after Easter. Why give up alcohol or smoking, sex or any other bad habit for 40 plus days only to be seen repeating them sometime after Easter? Some would dare to question, “who are you deceiving?”. Well, the answers would vary as to why you or anyone else should stop a habit for a period of 40 plus days especially during lent as the church would encourage her members to do and these answers would suit people differently but one essence of the period of lent is simply to start stopping these vices, dropping them one by one and gradually till the addiction and allure of such vices no longer ensnare the perpetrators.
Sometimes, starting is the hardest aspect and the vices seem bigger than they actually are because we are so used to living with them that we can’t imagine living without them. The trick is, as we all are in the period of dropping vices, together we start stopping and get strength, not only from within but from seeing others in the same struggle with vices and giving as good as they got to stop.
It will be gradual and painful but let the season be one where we start stopping our vices and long after the period of lent keep on stopping whatever vices till we have overcome them or it as the case may be.

How to get inspiration (FOR THE BLANK MINDED ARTIST).

Every form of art is traced to a source or multiple sources of inspiration. However, most creators of art or “artist” as some would love to be called draw blanks, literally and figuratively. Inspiration seems to desert them when they seem to need it. This is the worst thing that can happen to any creator of art. What is an artist without his art? Can you be called a singer without a song or a painter without a painting? Most established names in the arts like Leo da Vinci and Pablo all had a variety of sources of inspiration and these sources of inspiration were not easy to come by, some were just at their doorstep while others were so distant that they had to move their entire equipment to the site of inspiration. Getting inspiration in this present day seems a major task for many a creator of art and most people who claim to be artist just steal other great artist’s works and claim the credits for a work they can barely explain. The beauty of the greatest works of art lies in the revelation of not only the technique of execution or the attention to detail and perfection but importantly in the source of inspiration.
For artists who are struggling with inspiration, here are a few tips on not only how to get inspiration, but also how to stay inspired.
1. Eyes on the prize. If the goal of your art is money, fame or immortality, keep that at the fore of your mind. Motivation will inspire you.
2. Get high. For some that could mean taking a physiological stimulant, and others it could be a psychological stimulant, however stay away from lethal doses of any form of stimulant except you do not intend to see the rewards of your art.
3. Stop and stare. This could entail looking what other artists are doing in your area even if they are not in the same field as you are. Stop and appreciate other forms of art and submerge yourself in their work, music, painting, architecture, literature, whatever they do.
4. Thou shall not discriminate!!! Inspiration is what you seek and it can be found anywhere. Do not think less of a place, situation or person as they could be your next source of inspiration.
5. Have you heard of patience? Yes, she will test your resolve and if you have her, you might as well have a free pass in the halls of Aso Rock. Sometimes it is just a matter of time before the next big thing shows up in your mind.
6. Boundaries? Discard all of them, inspiration resides just outside your boundaries.
7. Relax! Tension is toxic for you and more importantly, for inspiration, let go of all anxiety its unnecessary and a waste of energy.
8. Read my blog over and over again!!! Yes and other blogs, as many as you can. It is like you having a sneak peak into peoples minds, mine inclusive.
If you know anyone who is in need of inspiration and seems lost, do that person a favour and recommend this blog (and other similar blogs). This is inspiration haven and it is not as hidden as Atlantis, just let them have access  to this fountain of inspiration and to the other blogs that inspire mine and watch the world become a better place.
Now, go out there and JUST DO IT.